Hi blog, its been a very very tough day for me today and I cannot express how fortunate I am to have survived the day.... I honestly thought I couldn't last the day without crying and isolate myself from all other human beings.

Its funny how things may seem as though the world is against you as much as you've been trying to be a nice girl who has done no wrong to deserve this. I disappoint myself... yet again, and I couldn't do anything but blame myself of how badly I've done... not just today, yesterday, but this semester... Have I not put in enough effort? Were my expectations too high? Am I just not good enough to deserve some little ounce of credit and hope that I could actually leave poly with my head up high?

(I feel sorry for my blog because its filled with so much sorrow and disappointments sigh)

Yes, I may have discreetly cried for 3-4 times in the LT today. Yes, I didn't socialize with anyone I was with for a period of 2-3 hours in the LT unless necessary. Yes, I am a bad bitch when feelings just bottled up inside of me and eventually blew up... well who cares? I'm just human. I'm an imperfect adult who's just having a bad day.

Now you might think this will become a negative post like always, but nope. I want to start thinking about what are the littlest things that made me happy today, instead of sulking about your sad moments. Life is too short to think about such negativity and sadness and anger. And I really thank those people who made an important impact in my life, big or small ♥

bb girl really helped me a lot today. At my weakest and darkest point in my life, I know I could always count on her. She always know what are the right things to say.. snapping me out of my doubts and uncertainty, reminding me why I first took this path in the first place.  How hard I've worked to get to this day. When I have no idea who I should talk to, I know she would understand me. I'm just very thankful to have someone like her who will always support me and will never leave my side on whatever decisions I make. Thank you bb..

And to my 3 drunken girls who always brighten my darkest days.. thank you for being the big listening group and letting me rant before I explode into pieces. Being with them makes me feel as though I could just be myself and I'm not afraid to show my flaws to them. Although I've first met them around a year ago(?), I always feel as though we're friends for a very long time.

My (Shit emoji).. yes, she annoys me 24/7, but she gives me love and happiness 24/7 too. She always make me forget all my thoughts and worries and be happy for the rest of the day regardless. As much as though she likes to tease me and stuff, I know she's concerned about me at times like this... even though she doesn't really show it often. I'm sorry if I made you worry or upset today, but I know you understand and thank you for your patience.. although you're impatient most of the time.

I have fallen so many times to get to where I am today, and I know I should continue on doing what I love and where my passion always lies. Taking it step by step... think about today, and worry about tomorrow. Think about the littlest things in life that made you happy and you will realize its worth living for. Including my parent, the people above, and to many other people who made my day in the simplest of things and actions each day. Thank you ♥